There is a crisis of self-esteem today, such that many people, especially young people, do not think well of themselves. They lack an appreciation of their dignity as human beings made in the image of God, and this creates many problems, such as self-loathing, an inability to receive criticism constructively, and a refusal to believe in the love God has for them. In a series of three articles, starting with this one, I wish to show how Catholic doctrine and the liturgy offer a response to this crisis. Here I will show how Catholic teaching on the dignity of the human person addresses the crisis of self-esteem, while in the next two articles I will show how the liturgy—particularly a bride at her wedding and a priest offering sacrifice—reinforces this answer to the crisis.

Admittedly, talk of self-esteem is sometimes superficial, unhelpful self-help “pop psychology” and therefore, we may have reservations about the topic. Consider four potential problems. First, talk of self-esteem can seem to say that people should always have positive feelings about themselves, whereas that is not realistic. Second, self-esteem is often connected to specious notions of “acceptance” and self-worth that downplay sin and the need for repentance. Third, if people are pleased with themselves as they are, they will rest content and not strive to grow in holiness by doing good works. Fourth, self-esteem can make people focus on themselves rather than go beyond themselves to form communion with God and others. In sum, the concerns are: 1) an overemphasis on feelings; 2) indifference to sin; 3) not being motivated to do good works; and 4) isolation rather than communion. I will address the first two concerns in this article, the third in the second article, and the fourth in the third article.

What Are You Worth?

While there are bad understandings of self-esteem out there, we cannot disregard the topic. Stripped of unnecessary associations, the term “self-esteem” simply refers to thinking well of oneself, and thinking well of oneself is a genuine need for human fulfillment. One cannot be truly happy if one does not have a sense of one’s value. In fact, when people do not know their worth, they are miserable and find it impossible to believe that God loves them. It is like a bride who does not think she has value. Can she believe that her bridegroom truly loves her? Can she believe that he sees something of great worth within her, if she does not believe there is worth within herself? Neither can we believe that God loves and rejoices in us, as a bridegroom over his bride (cf. Isaiah 62:5), if we do not see the great dignity within us as bearers of the divine image. People therefore need to think well of themselves, that is, to have self-esteem.

Now, to think well of oneself, a person needs a reason to do so. Here we see differences between good and bad versions of self-esteem. So many of the reasons for self-esteem found in our culture are wrong or insufficient. For example, we are told in our culture that we have value from being successful in a career, in school, or in some other endeavor, or from being physically attractive or popular. Other voices say that dignity comes from radical autonomy, so that to realize one’s dignity one must act in whatsoever way one wishes and choose one’s own lifestyle. But the Catholic faith provides the real—that is to say, the primary and fundamental—reason to think well of oneself. We are made in the image of God.

Why is being made in the image of God so amazing? St. Augustine teaches that having the image of God means that one has the potential to share in the very life of God.¹ Thus, to bear the imago Dei is to have the capax Dei.² This potential for sharing in God’s own life is what makes being made in the divine image so astonishing. Things have value according to their potential, as we can see from mundane examples. Thus, a pound of filet mignon costs more than a pound of ground beef. Why is this so, given that both cuts are the same amount of meat from the same kind of animal? It is because filet mignon has greater potential than ground beef to be made into a delicious meal. Likewise, minerals such as lithium, copper, and cobalt are more expensive than other minerals, such as iron or aluminum, because they, unlike other minerals, can be used in the circuitry of computers and smartphones. It is also why marble is more valuable than other rocks. It has a greater potential for being made into beautiful and ornate things.

How valuable, then, is the human person! A human being can be brought into communion with God so as to share in the divine life. There is no greater potential that a creature can have than to share in the life of the Creator and, thus, there is no greater dignity that a creature can have than the dignity that a human being has. This is one of the truths that shines forth in the Transfiguration. As the eternal Son of God, Jesus has always been full of divine light; indeed, he is the splendor of the Father (see Hebrews 1:3) and the light that enlightens every human being (John 1:9). But in the Transfiguration, we see this divine light flowing into and illuminating his human nature, the same human nature that you and I have. We therefore see in the mystery of the Transfiguration our own human potential to be filled with the glorious light of God. That is, we see our potential for sharing in the life of God.

Love the Sinner…

What, then, of the second concern mentioned above? That is, does promoting self-esteem undermine a sense of one’s sinfulness and the need for repentance? This can happen with false understandings of self-esteem, but not with the Catholic understanding described here. In fact, it is quite the opposite. Consider this analogy: Is it worse to deface a hastily drawn sketch on a napkin, or a painting that is a masterpiece? Of course, it is worse to deface the masterpiece because of its greater value. Likewise, when one sees one’s great worth as made in the image of God, one sees how bad sin is, since it defaces the beauty of God’s image within us (although it never erases that image). What makes sin so bad is that the human person is so good. The more we appreciate our inherent worth from being made in the image of God, the more we detest sin as contrary to it and repent of our sins (yet without hating ourselves).

Still, after people become aware of this teaching, they often struggle to accept it. This message about their tremendous worth from being made in the divine image remains merely a proposition rather than being accepted as true about themselves. One of the factors here could be the overemphasis on feelings that was mentioned as the first concern above. It is worth remembering that just as something can feel good and not be good, so something can feel bad and not be so. Sometimes we do not feel the goodness in ourselves, but still we need to believe in the tremendous goodness within us from being made in God’s image. Accordingly, the version of self-esteem being described here is not based on how one feels but on the truth of how God has made us. Besides an overemphasis on feelings, other things can factor into the struggle to accept one’s worth. These include old habits of thought, an attraction to alternative ideas about what makes a person valuable, fears of getting one’s hopes up by thinking one has tremendous worth, or having been made to think that one lacks worth by having been abused. It is obviously well beyond the scope of this essay to explore these factors. However, I would like to mention quickly a few things that can help in the effort to accept one’s dignity.

First, we should support the primary reason for thinking well of oneself with secondary reasons. These secondary reasons include being liked by others for one’s good qualities, being good at something, and even being beautiful. Each of these secondary reasons points to the primary reason, viz. that one is made in the image of God. Thus, when a person is liked for some good quality (not, of course, for a bad quality), this points to the divine image within the person, since the person’s good qualities are the glow, as it were, of the divine image within. Likewise, to be good at something shows one’s resemblance to the God who can do all things. Even exterior beauty points to the greater interior beauty of “looking like” God (that is, of bearing his image). Verbal explanations of the primary reason for one’s great worth need to be complemented by these secondary reasons, for they can more concretely point to the primary reason than verbal explanations can. The key, though, is not to treat the secondary reasons as the primary reason, but as pointing to it. Thus, if we make being good at something the primary rather than secondary reason for our self-esteem, that leads to problems, as discussed in the next article.

Second, we may have people say it. That is, when speaking to people about self-esteem, I have them say aloud, “I am amazing.” They nervously laugh as they do so, and I joke that they should not say this aloud in other settings, lest they seem arrogant. But the statement is true and it is not arrogant to say it as long as the credit is given to God. Each of us is amazing, not because of our accomplishments but because of how God has made us. The glory goes to God: “I praise you, for I am wonderfully made!” (Psalm 139:14).

Third, we need to let ourselves be looked at. How others think of us influences how we think of ourselves. This works to our disadvantage when the people around us do not think of us according to our true worth, but it works to our advantage when the people around us do. And yet, each of us has people around us who do look on us according to our true dignity. Most of all, we have God. We can let him look on us with his great love, noting how he sees in us the dignity he gave us and is pleased with it. We may do this especially before Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament.³ Recall the man who explained to St. John Vianney what he did in Eucharistic Adoration: “I look at Jesus and Jesus looks at me.” We can allow Jesus to look on us with love, for his loving gaze sees our dignity and leads us to see it as well. This can also happen when we let the Blessed Virgin Mary look on us with her great love. She, too, sees our dignity and helps us to see and accept it. They are not wrong in seeing the great dignity within us and we should not disagree with them.

In the next two articles, we will see how this Catholic version of self-esteem prompts us to do good works and leads us into communion with God and others.

The subsequent posts in the series can be found here: Doctrine, Liturgy, and Self-Esteem: The Wedding Dress (Part 2); and Doctrine, Liturgy, and Self-Esteem: Priestly Sacrifice (Part 3).

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1. Augustine, On the Trinity, 14.4.6.
2. Catholic teaching thus points to both the image of God (e.g., Catechism of the Catholic Church [CCC], 1700) and the capacity for communion with God (e.g., CCC, 27, 356; Gaudium et Spes, 19) as the basis for human dignity.
3. I am indebted to Dr. Peter Malinoski for this method. See “The Psychology of Courage,” The Catholic Gentleman Podcast, episode 14, https://megaphone.link/FUZ5878594809 (published June 9, 2021).